Hi!  I’ve just redesigned BobUnplugged.com, and I hope you’ll like it.  Remember that it is just a baby, so understand that there will be lots of new content.  And don’t drop it on its head.

I have wanted to make BobUnplugged.com a website that is part eCommerce, part fun, part opinion, part instruction and part personal therapy.  WordPress is powerful enough to do ALL that!  Now its up to me!  Check back often, and by all means, leave comments on my posts!  Just be advised that I will delete all comments that speak of my weight.

In just under a month, Kitty will be 10 years old. I got her when she was about 7 weeks old. I could hold her in one hand. Before long, she was holding me in one hand. She’s more of a people person than a dog. She does act like a dog in many ways. She plays and sometimes spars with her two Jack Russell Terrier sisters. She eats from a bowl, just like her sisters, and yes, she eats the same thing as them, dog food. She loves ziti, tomatoes, and carrots, but she gets very little of any of those. Every night after dinner, Kitty, Sally, and Lilly get chewies as a treat. Sally and Lilly scramble to their designated chewing areas, and have at it right away. Kitty takes hers to her spot and barks at her chewy for about five minutes before she starts chewing. I don’t know what she’s saying to the chewy. I don’t know what the chewy is saying to her. But you can count on this conversation taking place every night.

When Kitty is frolicking in the yard or especially on the driveway, she reminds me of Jack Nicholson in that move As Good As It Gets. When she runs up to a crack or an edge on the driveway, she jumps WAY over it, to make sure that she does not step on it. I don’t know why. She’s done it since she was a puppy.

One may look at Kitty and assume that her most valuable characteristic is her sparkly purple toenails, but its really not. Kitty has actually been one of the great teachers in my life. When she was a puppy, she came to work with me every day. There was a BIG man named Howard who came to our office to pick up out of date snacks for a shelter, where he also stayed. Kitty just adored Howard, and it was mutual. One day, Kitty was following him too closely and Howard made a surprise step, right on her front paw. I have never heard a dog yelp that loud! Howard felt so bad that he sat in a chair and cried. Kitty jumped on his lap and began licking the tears off of Howard’s face, her tail running like an eggbeater the whole time.

Kitty didn’t seem to care that Howard was living in a shelter. Or that he didn’t have any money. Or that he didn’t have a car. She could sniff right past all those outside things and love that man’s heart and soul.

Kitty’s lesson to me has been the same thing for the last ten years. Love everyone. She can be a little nervous around children, because one of the neighbor kids thought she was a carnival ride. And sometimes she’s a little shy around crowds. But she loves everyone. She loved Howard who has since passed. She thought that the guy that shut off my water one time was the bees knees. I said “This affects your bowl too!” but she didn’t care.

For ten years, Kitty has practiced what I’ve preached: Love everyone.

Once upon a time, in a land north of Missouri, and a land south of Minnesota, there was a Village named Vail.  It was a fertile land.  Very fertile.  Like really really COMPOSTY kind of fertile.  In that land was a Sourpeller.  The Sourpeller sold fruits of the fertile land.   

The Sourpeller  in the Village named Vail befriended another Sourpeller.  This Sourpeller sold EMD’s, which stands for Electronic Magical Devices.  The Sourpeller from the Village named Vail did not mind that the EMD Sourpeller was an overweight redneck or that he craved attention.    She said “Sourpeller of Electronic Magical Devices, I can’t help but like you!”

Both Sourpellers talked of many things, and shared their stories.  Their lives, their hopes.  They actually became fairly close, you could say!  Other Sourpellers sometimes called them names, but they did not care.  They defended each other.  That is what friends do!

One day, the EMD Sourpeller discovered something troubling.  The Sourpeller of fruits of the land took pictures of her wares, had prints made from her film camera, and then scanned them into her computing device, so that she could display them on an internet rest stop called Echo Bay.  Tedius?  Yes?  Necessary?  Yes, if you sell wares on Echo Bay, for but one image on Echo Bay is worth approximately one thousand words!

The EMD Sourpeller was saddened because his good friend, the Sourpeller of the fruits of the land, had a tedius process to move her wares to Echo Bay.  He acquired a device that would magically capture those pictures in a moment not a day and a drive, and accurately render them to Echo Bay within a few clicks.  The Sourpeller of the fruits of the land was pleased.  For the EMD Sourpeller had also included a card that would store THOUSANDS of renderings.

In gratitude to the EMD Sourpeller, the Sourpeller of fruits of the land sent him many treats from her garden.  Their friendship grew like lemon verbena on a nitrogen rush.

One day, another Sourpeller of restrictive devices purchased a device from the EMD Sourpeller for the sole purpose of leaving a bad review of the EMD Sourpeller on Echo Bay.  The Sourpeller of restrictive devices considered the EMD Sourpeller an Echo Bay “Leader of Cheer”.    So he purchased a device for twisting metal anchors into wood, steel, etc.  It is a device that some call a “Screwdriver”.  It was the lowest-cost item in the EMD Sourpeller’s shop.

The EMD Sourpeller was upset.  For he knew that Echo Bay was a land of satisfied buyers.  They quickly shun all who make their buyers frown.  The Sourpeller of restrictive devices purposely and falsely shunned the EMD Sourpeller,  so that he would lose esteem in the eyes of the Echo Bay Chamber of Commerce.

Many neighborhood Sourpellers had befriended the EMD Sourpeller, too.  And upon learning of the bad review that Echo Bay calls a “negative”, these friends sprang into action!  They purchased items from the EMD Sourpeller and immediately left good reviews, or “positives”.  The Sourpeller of fruits of the land also bought a “screwdriver”, the least expensive offering of he EMD Sourpeller.  She also left one of these “positives” for her friend.  “Thank you!” said the EMD Sourpeller.  The Sourpeller of fruits of the land said “You’re welcome!  My daughter will find this screwdriver handy.”

The EMD Sourpeller is bright and wise of the ways of the tides of Echo Bay.  But when the day came to send this “screwdriver” to his friend, he made an unfortunate discovery:  He had sold more screwdrivers than he actually possessed!    He could not fulfill the purchase made by the Sourpeller of fruits of the land!  His friend! His moral helper.

The EMD fretted and worried.   After a long time of consternation, he had an idea. 

(It must be said now that the governers of Echo Bay held a large gathering in the land west of Indiana and east of Iowa and Missouri.  Attendees clamoured for little pins that were distributed periodically, intermittently, randomly.  The EMD Sourpeller attended this event.  He had collected ALL of these pins.  He was proud of his collection, and enjoyed looking at it.)

The EMD Sourpeller, contrite, and regretful of the fact that he “oversold” his screwdrivers, sent his set of Echo Bay pins to the Sourpeller of fruits of the land.  “If I give her what cannot be replaced, she will know that I am sorry for my error”, he thought.

The Sourpeller of fruits of the land did not express her displeasure.  However, she was displeased.  The yearning in her heart for a convenient yet inexpensive screwdriver welled in her heart.  She became bitter.  And vile.

She swore to hate the Sourpeller of Elecronic Magical Devices.   She decided to try to make others hate him, too.  When strategies of truth and accuracy failed her, she said ANY WORDS in an attempt to make the EMD Sourpeller suffer for his clerical error.  Her rage flourished within her head.  She did not make the EMD Sourpeller aware.

He wondered, fruitlessly for months.   Even today, he pauses, closes his eyes, smiles in amused frustration, and then thinks about something else…

If you jump into a bowl of pudding, you’re going to look and feel a lot like pudding.

THIS IS THE DANGER of accentuating the negative. This is what happens when you complain of, magnify, and wallow in the negative. This is the natural product of complaining, casting doubt, doom-saying and declaration of defeat. Jump into a pool of negativity, and it will be all over you. You may even be mistaken for being negative yourself!

Life, eBay, and even friends will throw you curve balls. Some whiz precariously close to your head. Your success will not depend upon how much this happens. It will happen a lot. What your success will depend upon is your ability to rationally and POSITIVELY deal with your situation.

YOU MUST REMAIN POSITIVE in order to deal with life, business, or family. ANYONE can have a happy life if nothing goes wrong. But things will go wrong. I hope you’re ready to hear this:

The eBay marketplace is so strong and so vibrant that it has allowed some people who have weak coping skills and suspect business acumen to sell lots of stuff. They were lulled into a false sense of success and security. When eBay changed courses, they were left not only without the skills to adapt, but the attitude to do so.

When I hear excessive complaints about change, I envision a car illegally parked on the sidewalk. Most pedestrians, intent on their destination, walk around the car on one side or the other. There’s some traffic on one side. The other side is a little wet and muddy. But you see a stream of individuals making a decision, possibly muttering a comment, and moving on.

Here, I see Power Sellers standing on the sidewalk, backed up as far as the eye can see. Some are swearing at the driver. Some are on their cell phone with 911. Some people are saying that they should call a tow truck. Some really angry ones are rocking the car violently. Some are just standing in their spot of the sidewalk, waiting on things to move.

There will be the predictable responses to my analogy like “Well eBay is like a drunk driver intentionally mowing down pedestrians on the sidewalk.” etc. etc. etc. But it doesn’t change the fact that MOST people are on the other side of the car, barely detoured from their true goals.

Just walk around.

Nothing I can add to this, except WATCH!

My home town is very small.  Five thousand people.  Very mountainous.  I’ve been visiting cool people this weekend in Pittsburgh, and I’ve noticed that Pittsburg looks and feels so much like my home town, just a lot BIGGER!

It’s a great city!

Ok…  I’m not in the fjords, but I did go through some pretty purple mountain majesty on my way to Pittsburgh.  This is a beautiful town!

I have witnessed at least FOUR instances in the last two days of folks for whom I care, making, or contemplating making decisions while they are emotionally charged.  They may be charged with dissappointment, disgust, anger, or something else.  In each of these cases, these folks contemplated dealing immediately with their “problem”, when in fact, there was no deadline.

Time is our most valuable asset.  We sell our time, we spend our time, and we can give our friends and family no greater gift than our time.

What turns a pile of scrap cloth to a valuable new quilt?  Time!  What turns a valueble new quilt into a priceless heirloom?  Time.  What turns a handful of seeds into a garden?  Yes.

When you are mad, sad, shocked, or spurned, a little bit of time always makes it better.  There’s an old saying:  Time heals all wounds.  But that doesn’t nearly go far enough.  Time heals all wounds, yes, but time refines opinions, adds perspective, reveals secrets, and empowers us with information.  More information than we had when we were first blindsided with “the news”. 

My buddy Owen has a formula for comedy:  Tragedy + Time = Comedy.  Some things happen to us that will never ever be funny.  Some events will remain in our hearts for years, or perhaps the rest of our lives.   But they ALL improve with time.

Don’t let a piece of unfortunate news push you into a decision.  Stop.  Spend some time with yourself.  Consult the people you trust.  Do some research.  Make sure you know exactly what the situation is.  Your heightened emotion may last a day or less.  Don’t let that impaired judgement rush you to a decision that you may have to live with for the rest of your time.

I know a lady who goes shopping without her wallet.  Just her drivers license.  If she sees something she really likes, she will go home, get her wallet, and come back to the store and purchase it.  Isn’t that brilliant?  And I am sure that she has saved a lot of money over the years from that practice.  And probably saved herself some valuable time by not having to hold yard sales.

Tattoo Contest

Watch this space for more information on the Bob Unplugged tattoo contest. First prize each month: $100.00! Second prize: A Bob Unplugged t-shirt. Details coming soon!